Tuesday, July 06, 2010

BP levels rising!

The controversy over Deepwater Horizon oil spill / Gulf of Mexico oil spill (also called BP oil spill) is raging. This massive ongoing oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, is considered to be one of the largest offshore spills with about hundreds of millions of gallons spilling from a sea floor oil gusher, resulting in an oil slick spread over 2500 square miles.

An environment disaster undoubtedly, with a detrimental impact on marine and wildlife habitats, also affecting the fishing & tourism industries in the Gulf of Mexico. Miles of beaches, wetlands and estuaries are under threat. The BP engineers are working overtime to fix the spill or at least contain the damage.

The oil is spilling, the oil slick is spreading, the stocks are plunging, and…BP (read “Blood Pressure” from here on) is rising.

Well, this post is not really about the oil spill, why it happened or what are going to be the repercussions, nor is it about taking stock or pointing fingers. It is about my BP which has of late been on the rise…

Some crude reasons for rising levels of BP include:

  1. Global, National, Government, Political, General:
    • The BP oil spill (since we’re already on the topic), for whatever damage it is doing to life underneath and around.
    • The fact that it took 26 long years to pass the judgment on Bhopal Gas Tragedy and nothing much was done in the meantime to clean up the toxic waste (media frenzy and people fury only on current affairs, huh?).
    • The level of Corruption for moving every file under every desk in Government Offices. And to top it all, their lackadaisical approach (it’s the taxpayers money you’re sitting on, damn it!).
    • The highhandedness of Cops who seem to be out there only to make your life worse (busy meeting their targets must be – no. of cases booked, fines collected etc).
    • Bribe – givers & takers.
    • Dowry – givers & takers.
    • The extremists / rebels who do anything in the name of fighting for justice (religious fanatics, jihadists, terrorists…list is endless).
  2. Neighbourhood, People, Kids, family:
    • Gossip Mongers – especially those who seem to hang around-with and talk-behind-back of the same person.
    • Nosy parkers and peeping toms in the neighbourhood.
    • People passing lewd comments / uncalled-for judgments.
    • Kids acting like grown-ups, watching serials, telling lies or making lame excuses, being bullies (smartasses!), doing anything-but- behaving like kids.
    • Hubby asking you to fetch “this” or “that” when it’s actually closer to him and you’ve just sat down to put your feet up!
  3. Business, Workplace, Job:
    • Loyalty at workplace is hardly rewarded – Hee-Haw! (The jumping jacks make more money a month than what you make a year!).
    • The politics & double games you are expected to play to succeed in your business.
    • Boss who says “yesterday” for deadlines, “today” for meetings, and “tomorrow” for pay hike (but tomorrow never comes!).
    • Colleagues who try to dump the job & client on you, trying to keep their hands clean; Colleagues who send half-baked brief for full-baked ideas; Colleagues who pretend to be morons when they actually are jug heads…(list is endless).
    • Clients who want the best-in-class @ rock-bottom-prices! (And when the agency closes down because they almost did charity business with the same clients for dog-years, end up paying 10 times more hiring 10 such agencies!)
  4. Telephone, Emails, Internet, Computer:
    • Call centre executives (CCEs) who ask for Mr. XYZ, when their records clearly state the customer is female; CCEs who make it sound like the next half hour of product selling actually comes free, just that Rs.123 followed by a few 0’s will show up in the next month’s statement; CCEs (sitting in some Godforsaken place in Chennai) who ask “Why saar…you are the privilege customer, that is why we are giving you these special offer saar!” and can’t take “not interested” for an answer…(the list is again endless, nevertheless annoying!)
    • Phones through which you can’t hear a thing, and must repeatedly say “sorry?, excuse me?, could you please speak up a bit?...” and the person on the other hand thinks you are either deaf or dumb.
    • Computers that don’t work as fast as you do and “hang” just when the work is almost done but you haven’t saved the file yet.
    • Internet connection that’s slow as a snail.
    • Emails that don’t make sense even if you read, re-read, a million times over… and it still sounds like Greek & Latin!
  5. Traffic, Vehicles:
    • Motorists forming 6 lanes, when there’s space only for 2 lanes, and creating a traffic jam (The person in the extreme right lane is hollering & honking the most, because if he doesn’t, he’ll be at the receiving end!)
    • Buses halting in the middle of the road even when there are bus bays / bus stops, sticking their big red butts not letting anyone overtake, on the left or right!
    • Auto rickshaws overtaking on the left and denting the car or ripping the side-view mirror casing off (haven’t replaced it yet…too expensive!) and then having the gall to stop and pick up a fight (starts with wordy duel and almost ends in fist fights!).
    • The old fart engine packed in a box running on wheels, which leaves a trail of smoke & hoot, blackening your windshield and blinding & deafening other motorists within a mile.
    • Roads that are more like gaping holes (not just potholes) with ‘tar’ being a mere filler, in between.
    • No flyovers, pedestrian walkways / crossings, just roads that seem to be getting narrower by the day.
These are just few of the many things that can tick me off. My face flushes red and I think it’s high time I check my BP….Meanwhile send in your chants and sweet mantras that can help me keep my cool :)


Destiny's child... said...

mom getting unnecessarily worried bcoz sister has a stomach upset, old woman at the shop who won't give me something i ordered for days ago just becoz her son is not there, conductor in the bus who never seems to have enough, neighbour who always says, 'r u alive?' whenever he sees me...the list can go on...feeling better?

Nona said...

Well, you need to get that BP down. For eg: "Gym"ing, "Yoga"ing, "Aerobics"ing, "Meditation"ing are all good. :)

Once the BP settles down to normal levels, can you revisit the same list. IMO, there are a few things you have direct control over to change. :)

Insignia said...

Too good this was. The list is just complete. I liked the "# Hubby asking you to fetch “this” or “that” when it’s actually closer to him and you’ve just sat down to put your feet up!"

I just read it out to my husband and he is frowning :-P

Next I would pick the Business, workplace. There is one more BP here - colleagues who keep cribbing!!

The CCEs are really irritating lot. They dont understand "No, I am not interested". Why ma'am? is the question!!

BP due to all these is more grave than BP spilling :-P

A New Beginning said...

Oh oo, someones really in a huff...yes its a sad state of affairs, very frustating indeed..we'll have to start fixing it at our end..any part of it that we want...its not that we can stop oil spills but mabe generate awareness among others, we cant stop corruption but can start saying "no" to it,we cant make others follow traffic rules but we can do that ourselves....
I totally agree with you, it does make us angry ...but there are certain things we can rectify at our end...
Next time someone asks you for the paper while sitting closer to just tell him/her...."Im sorry honey, just kept my elongated magical hands in the cupboard..may be if you try yours would reach the paper";)
Smile and breathe easy RGB!:)

RGB said...

@ Destiny's Child,
We've all got our share of woes, eh? And when you see someone else with equal share or more, somehow you feel better:)

@ Nona,
Thanks for your tips. I've been wanting to do Yoga for a while, to help keep my composure...someday soon maybe:)

@ Insignia,
Another case of BP spill, aye? Glad you liked it.

@ A New Beginning,
I get irritated & annoyed with people when they pretend to be what they're not and behave like twerps. Your suggestions have been noted. Will try to contain the BP spill:P

The Holy Lama said...

High BP. No probs. Let's laugh it off at the cafeteria. Its's always them- dumbos, nit wits, pain you know where , dumbass etc etc. We are perfect, ain't we RGB.

Neena Sharma said...

What a comprehensive list. Some of ur reasons are mine too, for high BP.

Merlin said...

ROFL. Sorry, *controls laughter* No offence, I mean these are awesome awesome posts. However all in bullet points and neatly organized, either you are a very neat and organized person in real life, or you an MBA grad who took the MBA stuff really seriously :). Jokes apart, nice blogs, will probably hang around some more. My favorite in this list "Hubby asking you to fetch “this” or “that” when it’s actually closer to him and you’ve just sat down to put your feet up" :P

walk2write said...

We don't have the rickshaw problem here, but some drivers shouldn't be allowed on the road no matter where you live. When BP starts to get to me (oil spill or blood pressure), I dig in the dirt or take a walk or write it down. Sometimes I even sneak it into the blog! I like your bold approach to the problem.

RGB said...

@ The Holy Lama,
This blog post was a destresser in itself. And yeah, laughing it off at the cafetaria is the best medicine that has worked for me so far.

And you know, you and I score 10/10 on all counts, that's why we can rightfully pass judgement on tom, dick and harry :p

RGB said...

@ Neena Sharma,
We've got common reasons now to fret about;P Thanks for stopping by.

@ Merlin,
I'm basically a copywriter and more recently have been doing more of web content and presentation scripts - perhaps why it looks all too organized :P Glad you had fun reading my posts and sure hope to see you around more often.

@ walk2write,
Blogging is a good way to unwind, from all the madness that goes around. And comments from fellow bloggers such as you, are fabulous stress-busters I must say!

Bikram said...

he he ehe a nice compilation.. very true loyalty at workplace does SUCK big time..

some motorists are morons , how they got the license i dont have a clue.. and honking is common in india .. a red light, you stop they still HONK...

I try to keep cool, but i am more into punjabi style pick up a fight :)

or sometimes i just ignore, go to the gym , or write something

RGB said...

@ Bikramjit
Punjabi style fight? Tell me about it. I've been thinking of "yoga" for a while...need to keep my cool!